Our society is good at saying that we give forgiveness to people who commit crimes or infractions or violations of a rule that may have been broken. We are good at giving lip service with words, but our hearts are far from honoring those commitments of the word spoken forgiveness. If you do not believe me, commit a crime or infraction or violation, you would see some of your closest friends or colleagues turn their backs against you, run as far away from you and disassociate from you in a split second. They will give lip service, that you were a good and wonderful person and that everyone deserves a second chance, but will they truly give you forgiveness for your crimes or infractions or violations and give you a second chance?
Giving forgiveness to someone and truly believing in forgiveness are they one in the same or are they totally two different meanings. Saying to someone I have forgiving you of your transgressions, then in another breath turn right around and say I will not forget what you have done, is this real forgiveness? What is the real reason why these words are spoken, is it because of our own ineptness or inability of learning what is real or true forgiveness. Because if you cannot forget what a person has done, can you truly give forgiveness to them?
I know that we all can and need to learn from our past or other people's crimes, infractions or violations. You learn. Did you read what I just wrote, you learn from past failures and this is the crux of the matter. Everyone should learn, correct past behaviors and move forward, but you should not be or do not hold a person accountable for past crimes or infractions or violations if they have already been punished from past failures. You have given forgiveness and forget.
Forgiveness is to not feel anger or resentment, pardon someone of their failures, do not blame anymore, you are magnanimous toward others. This is what it is to give forgiveness.
Also give is very important word in forgiveness, because when you give it is freely given, not under duress, you freely gave of you own free will. I'm not going to say to give forgiveness is easy, because of our human nature to hold grudges towards one another.
Forgiveness in a society that seems to hold grudges against you, even if you have already paid the penalty for its infraction or violation or crime. You can go to jail, get fired from a job or punish, but days to months to years later people will still hold that issue against you even if you were punish and paid the price for committing that failure.
Why is it that our society will hold people accountable for past transgressions? Our society is quick to say that we forgive you, but our society will not forget or let go of what you did that go you into trouble. Everyone talks about forgiving someone from their past acts, but when it comes to putting your beliefs about forgiveness to the test, everyone fails miserable.
Athletes who commit domestic violence, the media is all over them for their transgression and their calls for these athletes to be punishments. Yes, when they commit a violation of the rules, they should be punished as to what the law says is their punishment. When a person has paid that debt to society as was instructed, should society still hold a grudge against them?
There are many examples of wrong doing that I could have mention, but Isaiah Thomas and Michael Vick (former professional basketball and football players) committed their failures or acts of wrong doing according to society's rules and regulations they were punished. Isaiah Thomas lost his job and paid millions of dollars to the victim. Michael Vick lost his job and went to prison for his failures. They paid their debt to society, right.
When they tried to get their jobs back, some in our society and some in the media jump all over them, saying that they should not be allowed back into their profession to make a living. Why are they holding a grudge against past deeds, how long does one have to pay a debt for past failures.
Where is their forgiveness? It seems some in our society, will sentence you to life and you can never make good on that debt or those failures. It always amazes me how one can be so ardent in their beliefs against other people failures and say punish them, punish them. But when they get into trouble, then they are looking for forgiveness and for people to forget.
There is a saying that says, you reap what you sow, so if you want forgiveness, you have to give forgiveness. Where is are forgiveness? Each man, woman or child has to look inward into their own heart and asked themselves when will I truly forgive and forget.